No, 20. First one is 20 total, and then the second one is 15 total. MATT: Both hit. Roll damage for each. MARISHA: Okay.
Not great. SAM: What are those dice? MARISHA: They're d4s, they're just fancy d4s. Yeah. That is four, eight, 11 points of damage https://oncasinogames.com/canada/baccarat/.
MATT: Between both? Great. So after the grapple fails and it pushes you away, you go ahead and pull back and then leap, kick it in the chest and then uppercut it in the chin. MARISHA: Yeah, that's cool. MATT: Looks back towards you. So that would be putting you up base-to-base with it there.
All righty. Ending your turn? Okay, at that point, the crowd is now screaming and begins to swell and push in this direction. These folks all begin to run back and around this way. This crowd begins to push, the guards are trying to push forward, and they can only get a little ways forward to there and there. Everyone just shifts out this direction.
LAURA: God, somebody's going to get trampled. SAM: It's really a hazard. They should have had more exits. LAURA: I mean, it's a fire hazard, for sure. MATT: Caleb and Nott, I need you both to make dexterity saving throws.
SAM: 15. LIAM: Oh, pretty good. That is 17 for me.
MATT: All right. You both manage to just bob and weave through the crowd to prevent being trampled and backing away from the chaos as people are pushing through. The entrance is too small for everyone to leave, and there's now a giant bottleneck that's beginning to push up as people are now screaming and trying to get out. They're crying, and the chaos is just swelling into this absolute cacophony. As soon as that finishes, the devil-toad carrying the dwarven girl, who was given a decree, exits out back with her to get her to safety. These two begin to slowly back away, seeing that things seem to be handled?
And the guards making their way in are looking scared at each other, not really knowing what to make of the current chaos. At that point, you watch as the woman whose chest was torn into by this creature suddenly-- (groaning) MATT: --snaps up into place. LAURA: Oh, shit.
Okay, we have to keep them from being dead. MATT: Top of the round. Jester, you're up. LAURA: Oh, god. MATT: What was your initiative again?
TALIESIN: Ten. MATT: Ten, oh, shit. That's right, you're with Nott, that's what happened.
So Molly, you go ahead and go for your turn as well. My apologies. TALIESIN: I'm going to yell to the back, open the tent wide! And I'm going to pull-- how far away am I? MATT: You're right there.
You're in the middle of the crowd as it's swarming around you and Yasha. TALIESIN: (sighs) I'm going to run around and see if I can flank that creature, if I can move towards flanking that creature with the other two. MATT: You can't really flank it, but you can get next to it. TALIESIN: All right. Can I get close enough to take a shot? MATT: You can, yeah.
TRAVIS: Take a shot? SAM: You have guns? TALIESIN: Well, old habit. (laughter) TALIESIN: As a bonus, I'm flipping it out, and I'm going to activate the first sword.
MATT: Okay, so you watch as Molly pulls the scimitar out, and as he unsheathes it, draws it across the side of his exposed chest, causing a little bit of blood to spill out, and as it does, he pulls the blade out, and you watch as the edge, suddenly, ice crystals begin to build on the outside of the blade. TALIESIN: And I'm taking a shot at the creature. SAM: Taking a shot? TALIESIN: Taking a slice. LAURA: Taking a stab.
SAM: But with bullets. TALIESIN: That's 21 to hit. MATT: That hits. TALIESIN: That's not bad. That's eight points of damage and one point of ice damage. MATT: Okay, so nine points of damage on the first strike.
TALIESIN: No, that was my bonus. MATT: That was your bonus, that's all you've got. Okay. So one strike, you cut across, and you watch as you cut this wide wound open, exposing the fleshy organs' interior, but they're frozen where the wound cut through, and it's still holding it together. It's looking like it's starting to hurt a bit and fall apart slightly.
SAM: This is the bigger monster? MARISHA: So it's the one I'm fighting? MATT: Yes. So that ends your turn, Molly? Brings us to the top. So Jester, sorry, back to you.
LAURA: Oh, now I'm worried. I'm worried about the undead. I don't know. Well, I don't think I would know this, so it's okay. I'm going to say to the air and say, dude, are you here, because this is like the coolest shit we've ever seen!
And then I'm going to cast Toll the Dead on the first zombie creature guy. And there's a bell that tolls. MATT: Toll the Dead. MARISHA: Oh, that's fucking rad, dude. LAURA: He has to make a wisdom saving throw or take 1d12 necrotic damage. MATT: Natural one.
Go ahead and roll a d12. LAURA: Oh, three. That's lame.
MATT: Three points of necrotic damage. So as this deep temple bell rings out in the air above, you watch as this creature who has turned and is beginning to just whale upon the surrounding allies that are curling at its sides, it seems to retract from the sound and cover its ears briefly before angrily lashing out. LAURA: And I made that sound like it was coming from my duplicate, and my duplicate's going to run back a little bit and stand next to the pole.
Yeah. MATT: Cool. Is that your turn? All right. The standing creature that's now been sliced, bludgeoned, and wounded by all three of you, is going to go ahead and make two strikes at-- roll randomly to see who it goes for. That's going to be at Beauregard.
It swings at you twice, both with its giant massive clawed fists, just striking out towards you. First one is 17 to hit? MARISHA: My armor class is 17.
MATT: Nine points of bludgeoning damage as the first one just slams you in the chest. You feel the wind knocked out of you for a brief second. The second swing's going to come at you. That's going to be a 20 to hit. MARISHA: Yup, yup, that hits.
And you've one hit left as well. What the fuck is happening? Why are all these fucking shh- snooker chalks coming out to kill me? Oooh, thank god!
*monkey knocks himself out* Wha-what happened? Did I- Did I just break him? Wha-What happened? I don't know but I'm happy about it. Okay. 3, 3, 3, 3!
I DON'T KNOW HOW! (Goodbye Jack. You and your sanity will be missed :'(. Oh wait, there he is again with a coke. Phew.)
I'm back and I brought myself a nice little coke, a nice little beverage for myself. Just- just to sip on, so I'm not that angry. Okay, so: while I was away, thinking about it, making myself a drink, I was like "How could I beat him?" 'Cause I'm terrible at parrying, and after looking at this, I just realized that maybe I can go the - uhmm - fuck, that's probably not possible, so say, maybe I can go on the other side of his hand? Ugh, I don't know.
Okay, the health is on 2. I don't know what number two is. What's number 4? I don't know what 4 is either. Okay, let's get 2!
2, 2, 2... ... that's a 3. Oh, I took damage. Oh, I'm dumb! *coughs* Oh-oh. Oh god! I don't know how I did that.
Bad idea! Niiice! *chuckles* He's kicking himself in the face! Okay, that was number... 4! 3, 3, 3... Nooooooo!
Could you die? Die for me? Die, die for me! I have one health and I'm supposed to be able to get to King Dice like this. What's 9? 9 is the monkey.
Oh wait, I have to do 1 and 3. 1, 1, 1, 1... 1! Okay, phew.
*imitates King Dice* Fuck you King Dice. Why is there a 5 in your head and not a 6, huh? Not good enough for the 6? 3, 3, 3, 3... 3! Okay, hopefully we can break the monkey again. So the most health I can have going out to King Dice is 2.
Oh man... Too bad, little bang-bang man! It's all over. *talks with weird accent* You didn't even hit me once times! Okay.
Here we go. 3, 3, 3... That's a 1, 1 is good enough. 3 or 2, DON'T give me a 1. D: 3, 3, 3... okay! Uh-oh.
Oh oh... Okay, okay, okay, can I do the thing? WHAT?! You fucking - That's unfair sir, that's unfair sir. You're changing up the hands.
Uhhng... Every other single time I fought him, it's been right-left-right-left! This time it's just like "Ah, I'm doing this side twice! Hope you don't mind." This is the most amount of bosses I've fought in this fucking thing so far! Need 2 or 3.
2, 2... Fuck, fuck, FUCK, FUCK!! It's not even halfway! I need to figure out better shots! 3, 3, 3... 3!
Oh my god I can have 6 health?! Wha-What the fuck? This is the monkey right?
Yeah... I can have 6 health?! Okay!
Okay, okay, okay! 6 health. What the F? The most health I have ever had in this game. Okay...
Okay. 3, 3, 3, 3, 3, 3... 3! Fuck, I've already down less health! Okay, I just have to use this here. Oh fuck you! Yes, yes, yes, okay!
*deep exhale of total concentration* Come on, get lucky, get lucky, get lucky - YES! Come on... OOOHHH GOD! COME ON! *shrieks* Yes, yes yesyesyesyesyes! My heart is fucking pounding right now. Oh oh.
Okay, that's fine. That's fine, that's fine. It's a war of attrition right now! YAAA-HAAAS!! OOOH, I NEVER HAVE TO LOOK AT YOUR CUBE DOME AGAIN! WHEW!
WHEW! :D Haha! Whew! Whew! Five minutes! Five minutes per attempt!
Been recording for an hour and twenty minutes, and I defeated the train after the first half-hour. I've been trying that for an hour. Excuse me, if I'm not just the least bit ecstatic! Oh, oh it's over!
Never ever ever again do I have to look at that cubed motherfucker! Sorry Robin, I know cubes are your thing but I'm lightheaded... Ooooh maaaaaan... Rarely am I that truly ecstatic to have anything happen in a video game. This is like Dark Souls or Bloodborne of- actually, this is stronger than that! Because the Dark Souls and Bloodborne stuff, I'm like, "okay, I'm getting it", and then I start getting better and better and better. This game's full of bullshit.
It's only because I had 6 health going into that that I was able to do that. The fact that I'm able to even get 6 health was the only reason I'm able to do that. Ugh, next is the Devil. I'm gonna leave him in an episode all of his own, because that's probably gonna take forever. It'll be funny to know the Devil turns out to be the one that I finished the fastest. *laughs* Anyway, THANK YOU GUYS so much for watching this episode!
If you liked it, PUNCH that like button in the face! LIKE A BOSS! And, high fives all around, *WAPOOSH* *WAPOOSH* Thank you guys and I will see all you dudes in the next video! Thanks for turning on the subtitles!
I worked hard on them! All subtitles have been provided by a Dutch fan of Jacksepticeye. Cheers everyone, hope to see younext time!
I really like your pizza! Okay, okay. There is no way that you're as hard as regular- bosses, right?
*sees progress* OOOOHWWW! "You set them up, I'll knock them down." You just did.
Okay. I need to change way for the charged shot, I'm not good with it. Can- Can I- Can I leave? Take me to the map, and I'm out, I'll be back!
Okay! 3 was a- 3 was an easy enough fight. The cigar, right? 1, 2, 3, 4! *makes weird King Dice-esque vomit sound* Why are you swallowing me, dude?
Well how kindly is that. He's cool-looking! I like him! *sings along with the music* I just jumped right into that. Where is it- oh charge shot does a LOT of damage!
That took WAY longer than last time! Oh, god! I might be in a predico here. And you s- You keep your one health, so I have to go for a 2 now?
2, 2, 2! Ooh, safe! *exhales* Okay, I can go for a 1 again, 1, 1, 1! *realizes he fucked up* NOOOOOO, FUCK! Oh, it's a fucking plane one.
Oh god. I don't know what's happening! Oh god, there's guys coming from the bottom! Okay, I even think I fe- I didn't realize I kept those as well. Okay mind the ghosts!
The ghosts will come from the bottom. Oh god! I can't even see what's happening. Oh god.
Oh my god! Thank you! Ooooh, I got so fucking lucky! So technically you can take a hit in most of these fights and come back and get more health, except now I need to get a 1 and then I need to get a 3.
1, 1, 1, 1, 1! I need to get a three. Oh my god, there's a start over?! Okay, 3, 3, 3, 3, 3!
NOOOO, NONONONONONO NO NO! Oh Jesus Christ. What are you, sir? (well that's rude, Jack.) Okay, okay, okay, that's a lot of balls!
Uohh! I don't know what this is! FUCK YOU! *in a Russian accent* "Ah-ha! You've noticed that my style is very Russian!"
I get it, 'cause she were rushing! :D Alright, back to square NUMERO UNO! This guy's not so tough. He's just a bunch of poker chips, and he comes at varying sizes. Oooh, okay, so I need a 2.
2, 2, 2, 2... 2! And then I need a 2 again. 2, 2, 2, 2, nooo- I almost jumped over it. Fuck. Oh, it's a new one.
Oh, that's a mad bastard. Okay, okay, I get it, I get it, I get it. Okay I get it, okay I get it, I get it. I'm not into it, but I get it.
And just dash out of that. Okay, I'm just gonna go for the 3. 3, 3, 3, 3! That's a- oh, 2 is safe as well, okay. Yeah, you can look it all you want. Can I just kill him here?
1, 1, 1, 1. Nice, okay. Back at full health! I don't like you.
I don't like you! You do that very differently each time. Oh, I can- Oooooh! Oooh, I didn't know that!
Okay that makes- that makes that a lot easier, and where are these fucking balls going? Wew. Oh, where was I?! I didn't even realize I was over there! Oh, I'm gonna get hit.
Oh, thank god! That was a- complete and utter waste! Alright if I can get a 3 and then a 2, I'll actually be able to finish this! 3, 3, 3, 3! DO NOT get a fucking 1!
A 3 or a 2! 3, 3, *sound of hesitation* 2, 2, 2, okay! Oh god, oh god. What the fuck?
WHAT THE FUCK?! Oh, shit man! I have to parry all his fucking cards?!
Sooo uh- "So clever, so dapper, ya betta' believe this dice is loaded. Hi-de-ho!" I have to do it all again. I have to do it all again. Oh... Misery, thy name as fuck. Alright, I need to start right now.
Which ones are which? Okay, 5- 5 is the rabbit. Okay, hold on, hold on! 5 is the rabbit! I'm writing myself a little cheat sheet *Sans flashbacks* Okay.
I need a super going into King Dice. I need to get a 2 and I need to get a 3. Alright, 2, 2, 2, 2!
TWOOOOO! I'm into this, I'm into this, I got it! The drums are with me *imitates music* 3, 3, 3, 3! Okay! Okay, I have to find out what boss number 9 is then I can write that down.
I only have two of them written down so far. *soft laughter* Oh shit, it's a new one. And it's a plane one! Oh god, oh stop! Oh I can just parry all these?
Okay. Ahhhh! Is this a matching game? Come here! (Good job Jack. You just wasted your super :D) Okay, is that that one?
That's not that one. What happens if I match them? Oh go-, okay, I have a match.
There we go. Oh god, why does matching you get you harder? Oh god, was I not actually doing any damage until now? (yep, life can be rough sometimes.) Oooh, that would be the suuuckiest! That'd be the worst Christmas present!
Okay, okay. Can I take any fucking damage on a cymbal banging monkey? Okay? Okay? Okay?
You are here? Yeah! *in a Russian accent* The game of memory! Okay, just fucking die!
Nooooo! I took a dam! I hate this monkey!
Finally. Yes, mash your own face, see if I care. I shouldn't have taken any damage during that!
I was doing so well! Okay, so now I need a 3. A 3 year old- 1, actually wait, that was number 9. 9 is monkey. Ooooh, thank god.
Oh god! Fuck you dude. I hate this!
*with legitimate anger* I hate this. I hate this so much. Oooh, I've never fought you! I don't like new things.
Tell us a little about your book.
The Angry Woman Suite, a Kirkus Critics’ Pick, is modern historical suspense (most of the action takes place in the 1930s and 1950s) with elements of coming-of-age, and of course a love story at its core, about a celebrity double murder at the turn of the 20th century, in Pennsylvania, and the attendant fallout on three generations of two families.
The title refers to a suite of ten portraits that figure predominantly in the plot. Declared “labyrinthine” by a Montreal Books Examiner reviewer, The Angry Woman Suite is full of twists and turns you don’t see coming until you’re well out of one and already into the next.
What inspired you to write this book?
Two things: I was writing character sketches for a class—in this particular instance, what I call the “crazy shooter” character who goes bonkers and shoots up a grocery store, yet everyone who’s ever known him swears he was the salt of the earth. Now, there’s no crazy shooter in The Angry Woman Suite, but the first character I created—Francis—was good and bad, sweet and mean, and so on. In short, a paradox like the crazy shooter character, and I wanted to explore that. Everything followed paradox, including going to Chadds Ford for a wedding and visiting the Brandywine Battle museum (the battle serves as metaphor for one of The Angry Woman Suite’s themes of independence). While at that battlefield, I imagined a woman looking back at her life, at her fight for autonomy—and that, between paradox and autonomy, is when I knew I had my book.
What are you doing to market your book?
I’d had an agent, but she quit the book business. So I told myself I’d get a review from some site, and if it was halfway decent, I’d consider it a “sign” to go indie (either way, trad or indie, you have to do your own book promoting). Well, their review of The Angry Woman Suite was wonderful and amazing and every other superlative you can think of—and here we are. I’m also doing lots of guest blogging ; giveaways, and interviews at review sites. I’m entered in competitions, and heavy into what I call “review.begging,” which sounds rather pathetic, but is paying off. In addition, Reviews site recently ran an ad in their newsletter (good).
How have sales been? Where have you had the most success?
The Angry Woman Suite is just out , so considering we’re in an introductory phase, I’d say sales are fine for where we are right now.
How are readers/reviewers reacting to your book?
This is the best part! Readers and bloggers tell me they’re loving The Angry Woman Suite! So I’ll hopefully be having more fun in another month or so when they hit. Right now, though, there’s a common thread to the reviews that are in: the words engrossing, superb, and fantastic.
What was the biggest challenge you faced writing this book and how did you overcome it?
Two of the three narrators who propel The Angry Woman Suite forward are male (and I’m not), so my biggest challenge was writing from the points of view of men! I ran almost every line of male dialogue past the men in my life. Two minutes into the first read, they all nailed me on the word fabulous.
What are the future plans for you and this book?
To keep introducing The Angry Woman Suite around, until September or so.
What is your next project?
I’m a third of the way into a first (untitled and on-hiatus) draft of a whodunit-and-why novel about a violence and murder on the banks of the San Diego River, loosely based on the San Diego Chelsea King case a few years back—only my story will be set mid-century. I plan on picking this project back up in September.
Have you published anything else?
I have one completely unpublishable novel in a drawer, but The Angry Woman Suite is my first published novel.
Any advice for other writers/indie authors out there?
Write the story you love, even if it’s painful. The love will show. So will the pain. An epic story has both.
Work on your story everyday, but always wrap a writing session at the top of your game—you’ll start the next day’s session rested and healthy and still at the top of your game. Neurotic artists are so yesterday.
Many authors write essays about my book and promoting our own work sounds about as appealing an idea as snow-shoeing without, well, snowshoes. BUT I’m here to tell you: it’s not that bad (I thought it would be, too). It’s a keyboard mostly, not a face-time Broadway audition. Keep stuff in perspective and keep moving forward. Have some fun.
I liked the book and enjoyed reading it. Many of the people were familiar and I had even met a few. I stood on the roof of the building where I worked and watched the two Concorde aircraft land together at McCoy Airport (now Orlando International Airport). It was a magnificent site. No other company in the world could have pulled that off. The building where I worked hosted several off-site events for the Disney organization and I knew many people who worked at Disney. Later I worked there as a contractor in convention support for two years while the cruise ships were being built.
All of which brings me to my concern for what is left out. The story of Walt Disney World is incomplete without reference to the convoluted and often contentious relationships with the neighboring governments of Orange, Osceola, Lake and Polk Counties and the cities of Kissimmee and Orlando. The relationship between Disneyland and Anaheim is explored in detail as it should be. The relationships in Central Florida should have been explored in similar detail.
There are stories about the handshake land deal between Jennings Overstreet and Walt Disney that are as much a part of Disney culture as the Mighty Ducks. There are anecdotes about the construction of the Magic Kingdom and EPCOT that should have been included. It would have been refreshing to hear Jack’s side of these stories. Jack has the opportunity to put to rest many of the urban legends about the design of the Magic Kingdom, and I hope he takes the time in another volume to address these legends. How many times did they repaint the bottom of the channel around Tom Sawyer’s island before they got the right color blue?
People who have not been inside the Disney organization may not understand the attitude that we did wonderful and amazing things merely because we could. And we could. The resources I had at my fingertips amazed me then and amaze me now. We could fill a convention ballroom with plants in a few hours. We could get hundreds of balloons on short notice. We had pyro-technicians on call. We could do evening special boat tours on the Seven Seas Lagoon with choirs and entertainment along the way. These were grand and wondrous projects and we did them because we could.
It is this sense of awe that I feel is most missing from the book. In many ways, Jack was a great enabler who provided the resources we needed and yet, he does not seem to be awed by it all. He should be. This was a grand adventure. While Jack gives us the names and places we need to understand what went right and what went wrong, he understates his own importance in these events and does not leave us awed.
At Disney Event Productions where I worked we had an expression. “Never underestimate the power of Pixie Dust.”
This is a good book. It is a fascinating look inside a visionary organization. You should read it, but I look forward to the next one which I hope will be sprinkled with Pixie Dust.